I’m pretty old school when it comes to a lot of things…one of them is marriage. Ok, more specifically weddings & marriage.
For as long as I could remember I wanted to be married. I still do actually. I always have visions in my head of what dress I’d like to wear, the color of my flowers, the gowns of my entourage, the songs that will be played during the ceremony…I don’t exactly have all the details ironed out but I think about them from time to time.
It’s very unlikely though that I’ll be getting married anytime soon as I do not have a potential groom to marry as of the moment. No matter how awesome & nice you think you are/your friends think you are you sometimes get that nagging feeling that something is different/wrong somehow because you’re still single…this is more reinforced when your effing nosy relatives (or worse!) complete strangers point this out to you. (Why do they always do that?!)
I’m aware couples will probably point out that weddings & marriage are two different things. I’m aware of it too. One can be “married” to another without having to go through a wedding. To some, the ceremony doesn’t matter to them as long as they love each other…that single piece of paper that the church or your local government gives you does not represent who you are as a couple. Plus, some people just don’t want to be bothered by all the headaches of preparing for a wedding. But like I said, I’m quite old fashioned …I’d like to have my cake and eat it too…have a wedding & be married. That’s not such a bad thing right?
I’ll be attending a friend’s wedding in 2 weeks…maid of honor remember? I’m quite excited for it. I hope that someday it’ll be my turn as well. For now, I’m just praying that I can walk properly in my high heels.
Photo courtesy of www.ashleysbrideguide.com
I really like this post and I’m glad that I ran across it. My family is big on saying “when are you getting married?” when they specifically know that I’m not dating anyone. Even worse, I had one aunt pull me aside and ask me if I was a lesbian… it’s definitely a difficult time. Though I know other women go through this, it’s nice to see it represented.
BTW: good luck being a maid of honor. I’ve been one twice now… Good and bad times (smile)!
I was looking up random clipart and came across your post here. I used to feel the same way you do. I think all girls are programmed to want to be married..or at least “get” married. Well, I did each one once, and was pretty bummed out by both experiences despite waiting until 32. As much as you want your wedding (marriage) to be the way you’ve imagined your whole life, there are other people in the mix…Moms, ministers, brides maids, and of course, “him.” I had my cake and ate it, too, and got crumbs all over the place. Now, I’m in a relationship that’s really been working (for 5 years)….but no wedding, no marriage in sight. We’re not even living together, just next door. We’re pretty much seen as freaks (worse than when they thought I was a lesbian before I finally got married!) but letting go of all those expectations, traditions and societal norms has really allowed us to focus on what really matters….each other, and a healthy relationship not encumbered by anything, or anyone. My two cents: if you want to go the “old fashioned” way, GREAT! Enjoy! But, just make sure you’re willing to let it all go for the right guy. It’s totally worth it.
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